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Saturday, November 10, 2012

Ambition

There is a fire raging on and it is consuming the Earth one piece at a time. No one knows when it is going to die out and how much it will consume before it it through. That fire is within me, burning through the day and night, chomping at the bits to try and gain fuel and get brighter. I am not really sure how it started, but all I know is that it needs to be fed and controlled. Some would say that I am ambitious and likes to overreach my goals, others say that I need to take it easy and enjoy life and be more content. Which do I prefer?

Well, fire of course! A gypsy once told me that the reason that I was so driven was that in a previous life, I felt I was lazy and wanted to change. She described it as a billiard ball hit another ball and transferring the energy/feelings from one soul to the next. I am not quite sold on this yet, as I believe that my ambition and drive came from some interesting life events a couple of years ago. I won't go into details, suffice to say that it was external motivation first, which gradually became internal and fuel the fire.  

Life is about the choices that we make, I made a choice to block out certain aspects of my life and focus on others. I've always had dreams, but realistically they were always out of reach until I saw that by focusing intently on those dreams, I had made small but effective progress. That confidence allowed me to gain the strength that I needed to further block out stuff that was not important and like a positive feedback loop it created the person today. Knowing that I can conquer most challenges is very empowering and it gives me great hope that I can conquer the future as well.

So for the time being that fire will rage on and consume all the goals and challenges that are in my way.

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